I Would Be Happier if, “Mr. Scalpel,” Did Not Meet, “Mr. Sternum.”

Dying is for suckers.

Well, the pressing onslaught known as finals has temporarily lessoned. So, instead of applying myself constructively, I thought I'd do this.

Now, I'm not one for talking shit, except for very sarcastically, but I just cut some hot jams and they are the mother fucking jam. They walk up to your shit and say, "Yo, mother fucker, you think you're hot jams, don't you? Well you ain't. You just some punk-ass fucker who could touch me like you're Michael Jackson and I'm a small child. Even if you tried there'd be all these sirens and lawsuits and shit." I'm lying; they're actually not that good. They're not bad, but I'd be surprised if more than two people find them enjoyable.

I think now would be a good time to introduce Kwong's Law of Getting Action. The law is as follows:

If, and only if, one is not in a relationship that includes action as a benefit, the amount of action one receives is the inverse of the amount of action one expects to receive.

I have yet to be proven wrong.

-Thomas